It's been a while

It's been a couple of weeks since I last posted anything and I like to think I've got a good reason, I'm not just being lazy it's more of a taking care of myself situation and trying to get my head wrapped around what's happening. 

The lump on my head is getting bigger, there's a fluid build up around the centre between the hard lump and the skull and it's starting to effect other things. My vision has started to be effected with dizzy spells and headaches being thrown into the mix add to this a slight balance problem and as you can imagine I'm having a lot of fun trying to think of anything else.... is that a good reason why I haven't had an entry in a while I think so!

I've had an ultrasound, funny side note I was talking to an old friend who I've known since primary school and for some reason told him I'd had an epidural instead of an ultrasound, guess that would be a unique treatment plan! The scan came back inconclusive, it could still be a lymphoma, a build up of fatty tissue but the fluid element isn't usual. So I'm booked in for another ultrasound, I'm in for an MRI and a CAT scan, maybe I'll prove to those doubters that yes I do actually have a brain after all this time!

It's odd most of the time I can forget it's there but then I have a moment of blurry vision or I stumble along a flat piece of floor and it reminds me of itself. I've thought of naming it, Johnny, Ryan and Sarge are three names that came into my head as three people from my past I truly despise but at the moment it's been called the cranial critter, something I think encapsulates the thing quite nicely.  I know I have a bad reputation for using humour to try and deflect from serious issues and this is no different. I like to think of it as a form of armour that protects me from getting bogged down in the whole worse case scenario of the whole thing. I won't lie it's something I've thought about what could happen and if that's the case then I've already got my make a wish list ready to go! There's that bad humour again

It's at this point that I want to thank my friends and family keeping my spirits up and being there if I need to unload a little, I wish they wouldn't google the symptoms and come up with deadly diseases I could have, but that aside thank you so much, you don't know how much it means to me that I have you lovely lot to fall back on. 

So that's it just a quick update on things, don't worry I'll face whatever comes at me with a fierce determination unlike my football who as I type are currently losing 2 - 0 and going out of the Carabo Cup, which is about as typical as it gets!